Answering the Creative Call, in Art and Life

Often in our lives we are faced with many obstacles, hardships, and grievances.

Showing up daily for ourselves takes a lot of inner resilience, dedication, and perseverance, especially when we are faced with hard times.

Over the years I have learned it’s easier to turn away from what is hard, and its harder to turn and face ourselves, our true desires, what we really want not just in art and our respective creative practices, but in life as well.

At the same time when we turn away, blame, stay closed off and shut down, we lose the opportunity to heal, grow and evolve.

It’s easy to stay stuck in the same place, by telling ourselves old stories, or not taking action to move forward.

I know because I have done this for years.

But what if there is something more waiting for us once we turn and look inside?

Five years ago, my world started to crumble, although I was on the healing path since 2010, I still wasn’t facing my true desires, to be an artist, nor was I facing myself.

All the shame, pain, guilt, and fear were buried once under drug use, now secondly under spiritual pursuits…

It wasn’t until my world started spontaneously falling apart at the end of 2015 until 2018 where I would have to learn how to turn and face all the things inside of me.

I had been denying the true calling in my heart for a long time.

At the same time, I had to turn and face what wasn’t working.

I had to admit my mistakes.

I had to find peace and surrender within the process of falling apart. In the process of losing my footing, I found myself, the one I abandoned long ago.

It was hard to admit that all I wanted to do was be an Artist, and I had been denying that side of myself for so long.

I also had to unlearn everything everyone every taught or told me. I had to learn to start operating from my own power. To be my own agent of change. To stand at the center and embrace it all.

Sometimes it’s hard to trust the tiny whispers in our heart. Often, we have buried the truths, or pushed away, or denied the longings for too long.

We may have told ourselves, we were not good enough, or thought it would be to much work to start over, in art and/or life.  All of these things can derail us from what’s calling us forward.

Of course, there is always a time and place.

I spent many years thinking there would always be a right time, now I know there is never really a right time. We are always changing, growing, moving forward in art and life.

Things fall apart and fall back together. And nothing ever stays the same.

So, if you have been waiting to explore something, to turn and face something deeper within yourself, my question to you is:

Isn’t it time you trust your own heart?

If you are looking for guidance and support through these times, are interested in living into your fullest expressions in art and/or life or desire to open to more of your creative life, coaching is available, click here to read about Intuitive Creativity Coaching and feel free to message me here.

Learning to Trust Ourselves and Open Up In Art & Life

The creative heart longs to reach it’s way towards the light. A life is shaped by the many threads, colors and experiences we endure.
And learning to trust ourselves along the way can be a long and winding road.

Depending on what we have been through in life, some of  us might have more challenges and obstacles to have to face and confront when returning to our creativity, our hearts and our art.

A painting and a creation is often born in the shadows and darkness. Much like a lot of life’s mysteries, trials and tribulations happen along that way and as we are confronted with each step we learnt to turn and face ourselves.

As we move towards what we love, learn to heal our wounds, start to find our unique voice, and personal power, both our art and our hearts are changed in the process.

Sometimes shutting down and separating from our selves was necessary for survival. However there comes a point and a time in all of our lives were its time to turn and face what has been hiding out and

It isn’t always necessarily an easy road, but we can learn to face ourselves along the way. Actually, I would contend that it is in facing ourselves where we can actually create more space, freedom and energy, and even create a daily creative practice if that is something one is looking to do.

The arts are what keep the mysteries of life alive and to be an artist of any kind is to enter into the great mystery of life.

Often when starting out, especially if we have been locked up for a long while, there are many fears we must tackle.

The interesting thing about a creative practice and in my case, specifically an artmaking practice, is it teaches us over time to trust ourselves.

The more one is willing to show up and face themselves, the more an opening can occur, and inner trust and resilience is born.

I have found that working  on a deeper level, consistently over time in art and life,  yields results and sometimes the results are abstract, as in they are not necessarily identified by external rewards, they are more intrinsic of value.

Through our creative practices the internal openings start to unfold from the depths of our being.

Once we sit with ourselves long enough, our art and our creativity begins to take a new life of its an own and a new language starts to emerge, that is specifically ours and ours alone.

This understanding over time has me heavily invested and interested in the processes and practices of artmaking and creativity because it is in the unknown where we make an object and often even ourselves, known.

There’s a push and pull between what wants to be created, what we are wrestling with internally and what is longing to emerge and express itself.

Often times we enter blind, in the dark, flailing, trying to find ourselves and our voice, this is much akin to the path from childhood to adolescence to adult hood.

The journey is uniquely ours to make and take.

Just like in an artmaking and/or respective creative practice only YOU can determine where you are going, but sometimes life throws us a curveball and we all need a guide at times.

So, we have to learn how to build strength from within in order to create the things that are calling out and wanting to be created in order to show up every day to our creative practices and life itself.

And it’s through the process of letting go through making marks, choosing colors, scribbling and scratching we find our voice start to emerge, through choosing to show up to the blank page and write the first words, through saying, YES I am going to follow this path, even though it seems absurd, and it is through being willing to risk yourself for a little adventure were we learn to become stronger internally.

But we must show up and do the work. We must be willing to unlearn and learn. We must be willing to gently look at what may have been holding us back from really going forth. We must turn and face ourselves.

If we can start to own our stories and journey, we start to carve out a new path, a path that has always been there, but we just had to be willing to take the first step towards it.

In facing ourselves we free up our creativity practices and our lives to embrace more of what is. We learn to hold it all in our hands, the pain, the grief, the beauty and the light.

And we can start to create from the deeper wellspring of our beings. We start to realize we matter. Life matters. Our ART and CREATIVITY matter.

So, we show up.

And we do it over, and over in order to build new pathways and connections to our hearts and minds and with each other.

Overtime repetition creates new memories and we are able to lean in deeper each time we show up with our art, creative practices and our lives which in turn has us opening wider each time.

It is through the creative heart we discover who we are, and it is through art and creativity where we can start to embody our experiences.

As we connect more deeply to ourselves, we learn to land safely within the spaces and places we used to dare not enter, but as one discovers that it’s not that frightening after all once we befriend and face ourselves  we are able to remember together what its like to discover new worlds emerging.

It’s through each mark, and each moment.

Each word, and each song.

Each breath and each wild encounter.

This is the heartbeat of art and creativity and it’s pulsing, alive, and available for us all.